The Unexpected High-Five: Finding Meaning in Connection
Books that changed my thinking, my behaviors, and my life
Hello,
Hi-Fives. Low-Fives. Give me a Five—whatever you call it, that moment of two hands meeting in mid-air is all about connection. And when it happens unexpectedly, it can be a powerful reminder of the ties that bind us.
Every morning, I head out for the same jog: a left turn out of my driveway, north through the neighborhood, a 1,000-foot climb to the upper foothills of the Wasatch mountains, and then a flat stretch of two miles past Utah’s largest cemetery. Nothing like a daily run by the tombstones to remind me how fleeting life can be.
One crisp fall morning, lost in my own world with headphones on and my breath mixing with the mountain air, I noticed a biker in the distance, heading in my direction. Usually, I’m focused—head down or staring at the mountains ahead. But as the biker drew closer, something unusual happened. At about ten feet away, he caught my attention, and when he was just five feet from me, he stretched out his right arm, hand open. He wanted a high-five. As we passed, I reached out instinctively, and our hands connected with a perfect, resounding slap.
I smiled as I kept running, struck by how much that small gesture meant. In thirty years of jogging, passing countless bikers and runners, I’d never shared a high-five. Usually, it’s the quick nod—acknowledgment without engagement. But that unexpected high-five carried a message: Keep going. You’re doing great. We’re all in this together.
Now, I’ve made it my mission. On every jog, whenever I pass another runner, I offer a high-five. Sometimes they take it; sometimes they don’t. Either way, I love the moment of reaching out. It’s about connection, encouragement, and finding joy in the simple things.
Welcome to this week’s Three Book Thursday.
1. Human psychology
The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can make a Big Difference
Summary
The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell is about that fascinating moment when an idea, trend, or behavior crosses a threshold and spreads like wildfire. Gladwell digs deep into what makes things “tip” from the ordinary to the extraordinary—whether it’s a fashion trend, a social movement, or a product suddenly taking off. At the heart of this book is the idea that small changes, applied in just the right way and at the right time, can lead to massive, often unexpected, results.
Gladwell introduces us to concepts like Connectors, Mavens, and Salesmen—types of people who have an outsized influence on spreading ideas. He also covers the “stickiness factor,” that crucial element that makes information memorable, and the “power of context,” which shows how environmental factors can drive behavior. The Tipping Point isn’t just a book about sociology; it’s a blueprint for understanding how influence works and how we can harness it in our own lives, whether we’re looking to build a brand, start a movement, or just make a difference in our own corner of the world. Gladwell’s insights feel just as relevant now as they did when he wrote them, making this a book that both entertains and equips.
Note: Gladwell published a follow up titled, Revenge of the Tipping Point, which I read and will share my notes in a future 3BT.
Favorite Quotes, Insights, & Principles
Quote: The smallest things can make the biggest difference.
Insight: Once you start to change the smallest details of your daily life, the change becomes contagious.
Principle: People don’t change their minds. They change their behavior first, and then they change their minds.
Author: Malcolm Gladwell
Themes: Human psychology, Decision making, Marketing
2. Philosophy
Right Thing, Right Now: Good Values. Good Character. Good Deeds
Summary
I’m a big fan of Ryan Holiday’s and his most recent book hits the mark. Right Thing, Right Now zeroes in on the importance of taking immediate, decisive action—especially when circumstances are less than ideal. The book’s premise is simple yet profound: stop waiting for the “right” conditions and start acting with what you have, where you are, and as you are. Holiday dives deep into the nature of procrastination and hesitation, arguing that these habits are rooted in fear, overthinking, and the search for perfection.
Holiday’s message is that progress is about taking the next best step forward, right now, rather than waiting for some perfect moment. Through a blend of real-life examples and practical philosophy, he shows us how meaningful work and personal fulfillment are born out of action, not endless deliberation. Right Thing, Right Now is a call to move forward with clarity and courage, making it a powerful read for anyone looking to shake off doubt and create a life rooted in purpose and momentum.
Favorite Quotes, Insights, & Principles
Quote: The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. -JFK
Insight: The weather will change, but the stars do not.
Principle: The right time for the right thing was always right now.
Author: Ryan Holiday
Themes: Philosophy, Personal development, Living a full life
3. Biography
Mountains Beyond Mountains: Healing the World: The Quest of Dr. Paul Farmer
Summary
I read this book in my final year of medical school and it had such a profound influence on my subsequent training in emergency medicine. It is one of my favorite medical biographies. Mountains Beyond Mountains is the story of Dr. Paul Farmer, a relentless, inspiring physician with a mission to heal the world’s most neglected people. From the poorest regions of Haiti to Peru, Russia, and beyond, Farmer is not only a doctor but a force of nature, tirelessly fighting against poverty and injustice. His philosophy is clear and unwavering: health care is a human right, and no obstacle—no mountain—is too high to climb for those in need.
Kidder takes us through Farmer’s journey, where medical expertise, social justice, and sheer determination converge. This isn’t just a book about medicine; it’s about the power of one person to effect profound change. Through Farmer, we see how compassion, resilience, and a deep sense of purpose can create a ripple effect across the globe. For anyone interested in the intersection of medicine, humanity, and social responsibility, this book is a call to action, a reminder that we can all reach higher.
Dr. Paul Farmer died unexpectedly in his sleep on February 21, 2022. He was in Butaro, Rwanda, where he was working.
Favorite Quotes, Insights, & Principles
Quote: Never underestimate the ability of a small group of committed individuals to change the world. -Margaret Mead
Insight: The goal isn’t to live forever; it’s to create something that will.
Principle: I can’t save the world, but I can change the world for one person.
Author: Tracy Kidder
Themes: Biography, Leadership, Patient care
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