When Handshakes Matter: What the Israeli Diamond Exchange Taught Me About Trust
Books that changed my thinking, behaviors, and life
Hello,
A few years ago, I made a handshake deal with someone who would become my business partner. There was no contract, no legal documentation—just trust.
We spent the next year and a half building something incredible together. We poured our hearts and souls into this venture, fueled by a belief in the strength of our word and the shared vision that brought us together. It felt right. It felt old-school. It felt solid.
Until it wasn’t.
When things fell apart, it wasn’t just the deal that unraveled. It was the trust. A handshake—an unspoken bond—had been broken, and it felt like a knife to the back.
It was more than a business disappointment; it was a personal betrayal. In that moment, I learned the hard way that not everyone’s hand honors the shake.
And yet, this lesson wasn’t as black and white as I first thought.
Recently, I found myself in Israel, touring the famed diamond exchange. It was a mesmerizing experience—a glimpse into a world steeped in tradition, precision, and trust. I watched as master traders examined precious stones under bright lights, their movements deliberate and their eyes sharp with years of expertise.
At the end of the tour, I had the opportunity to purchase some diamond jewelry. After spending nearly an hour learning about cuts, clarity, and carats, the diamond trader and I settled on a price for a stunning piece.
Then he extended his hand. I extended mine. And in that moment, he said the words: “Mazal u’Bracha.”
To seal the deal, he explained, these words—which translate to “Good luck and blessing”—must be spoken.
I smiled and repeated back, “Mazal u’Bracha.”
It wasn’t just a formality; it was a centuries-old tradition. A handshake and a phrase, rooted in Jewish heritage, bound the agreement.
There was no immediate payment. He would ship the diamond overseas to me, and I would pay upon its arrival. Everything about this transaction rested on mutual trust.
Mazal u’Bracha.
The phrase carries profound weight. It’s more than a polite exchange; it’s a declaration of goodwill and a commitment to integrity.
Its origins trace back to Jewish merchants and tradespeople, especially in the medieval period, when formal contracts were often impractical. In the diamond trade, where trust is paramount, this practice became the foundation for agreements that spanned continents and generations.
By invoking divine blessing, the phrase underscores that success isn’t just about individual gain—it’s about shared prosperity, accountability, and respect.
Hanan Savransky, the diamond cutter who guided me through this process, embodied this tradition.
Hanan’s family has been in the diamond and jewelry business for generations, honing their craft with unwavering precision and pride. When he introduced me to Mazal u’Bracha, it felt like more than a sale. It felt like stepping into a tradition steeped in ethics and connection.
Since then, Hanan and I have stayed in touch, and while I know I’m a customer to him, our interactions feel deeper than mere transactions. There’s an authenticity to the relationship, a reminder of what trust in business can and should look like.
Reflecting on these two experiences—my broken handshake deal and my Mazal u’Bracha agreement with Hanan—I’ve wrestled with what it means to trust and to be trusted.
Does one betrayal mean we should never trust again? Or does it teach us to be more discerning while still holding space for the beauty of genuine connections?
Here’s where I’ve landed: Trust is a risk, but it’s a risk worth taking.
The lesson isn’t to avoid handshakes or verbal agreements but to recognize when and with whom they hold meaning.
Not every hand will honor the shake, but when it does—when trust is met with integrity—it creates something extraordinary.
My experience with Hanan reminded me of that.
Mazal u’Bracha.
The tradition also offers a deeper lesson for life beyond business. It’s a call to approach every interaction—whether in commerce, relationships, or daily life—with integrity, respect, and the intention to uplift.
It’s a reminder that our word carries weight, that trust is both fragile and transformative, and that our actions ripple beyond the moment.
Saying you’ll never trust again because of one betrayal is like saying you’ll never open your heart again. It may protect you in the short term, but it cuts you off from the extraordinary connections that give life depth and meaning.
Embrace trust, even when it feels risky. Hold yourself to the highest standards of integrity, not just because others expect it, but because it’s who you are.
And when the opportunity arises to honor a handshake—whether literal or metaphorical—do so with the full weight of your character behind it.
And then, for good measure, put it in writing (because, well, life happens, lol).
Welcome to this week’s Three Book Thursday.
1. Memoir
Uncle Tungsten: Memories of a Chemical Boyhood
Summary
Uncle Tungsten: Memories of a Chemical Boyhood by Oliver Sacks is an enchanting memoir that invites readers into the curious, scientific, and deeply human world of one of the most extraordinary thinkers of our time. Sacks recounts his childhood fascination with chemistry (and inspired mine), blending his love for the periodic table and scientific discovery with poignant reflections on family, identity, and the wonder of growing up in a world alive with questions. For anyone who’s ever been curious, this book is a profound reminder that curiosity isn’t just about finding answers—it’s about embracing the journey of discovery itself.
As a huge fan of Oliver Sacks, I’ve read almost all of his works, and each one has left me in awe of his thoughtful, genuine storytelling. Sacks had a way of weaving science with humanity, drawing connections between the two in a way that feels like poetry. His life itself was an incredible story, and in Uncle Tungsten, you can see the seeds of that brilliance being sown in his childhood. This memoir isn’t just about chemistry—it’s about the sparks of curiosity that ignite a lifetime of exploration.
What struck me most in Uncle Tungsten was Sacks’ ability to find magic in the mundane. Growing up in wartime London, he sought solace and fascination in the elements, discovering beauty in things like tungsten’s luminous glow or the symmetry of chemical compounds. His Uncle Dave, whom he affectionately called “Uncle Tungsten,” nurtured his scientific imagination, teaching him not only the principles of chemistry but also the importance of persistence, observation, and the joy of seeing the world differently. These lessons resonate far beyond the lab—they speak to the heart of how we approach life, work, and relationships.
Sacks also captures the power of self-directed learning. At a young age, he was methodically teaching himself the principles of chemistry, running experiments in his own makeshift lab, and discovering the wonder of science through trial and error. It’s a reminder that learning doesn’t end when formal education stops. Curiosity and growth are lifelong endeavors, fueled by our willingness to ask questions, take risks, and challenge ourselves.
So, if you’re seeking inspiration, if you want to rekindle your curiosity, or if you simply want to immerse yourself in the story of a boy whose wonder shaped the man he became, this book is for you. Let Sacks remind you of the joy of discovery—whether it’s in a chemical reaction, a new idea, or a moment of quiet reflection. His story will leave you inspired to find the wonder in your own life.
Favorite Quote, Insight, & Principle
Quote: The periodic table was more than a chart—it was a poem of the universe, a symphony of patterns, order, and endless possibility
Insight: Discovery is joy; it is the moment when curiosity meets the thrill of uncovering something new and unimagined.
Principle: In science, as in life, failure is not an endpoint; it is a step toward understanding, an invitation to explore further.
Author: Oliver Sacks
Themes: Memoir, Science
2. Patient care
Just Here Trying to Save a Few Lives: Tales of Life and Death from the ER
Summary
When I was in medical school, just beginning to discover my passion for emergency medicine, I devoured every book I could find on the subject. Back then, the specialty was still relatively young, and there weren’t many books capturing the raw, unfiltered experiences of ER doctors. But one stood out to me—Just Here Trying to Save a Few Lives: Tales of Life and Death from the ER by Pamela Grim. This book wasn’t just an eye-opener; it was a lifeline. It helped solidify my choice to pursue a career where every second counts and every encounter has the potential to change a life.
Pamela Grim’s memoir is an intimate, gritty, and profoundly human look at the triumphs and tragedies that define emergency medicine. Grim writes with a sharpness that cuts through the chaos and a vulnerability that reminds us why medicine is, at its core, an act of service. She doesn’t sugarcoat the reality of life in the ER. The long hours, the gut-wrenching losses, the moral gray areas—they’re all here. But so are the moments of connection, the unexpected victories, and the reminders of why this work matters.
What struck me most about this book was its honesty. Grim captures the dichotomy of the ER—the adrenaline-fueled pace and the crushing emotional weight, the simultaneous clarity and uncertainty that define life in medicine. She reminds us that as much as emergency medicine is about saving lives, it’s also about bearing witness.
Some days, the win is clear—a pulse restored, a life saved. But other days, the victory is simply being there, providing comfort, and doing your best, even when the odds are stacked against you.
One of the most poignant lessons from Just Here Trying to Save a Few Lives is the idea that we don’t always control the outcomes—but we do control how we show up. As Grim writes about the patients she couldn’t save, the ones who left an indelible mark on her memory, she also highlights the power of presence. In those moments when the medicine runs out, compassion becomes the most potent tool we have.
For those of us in medicine, this book is a reminder of why we chose this path and Grim’s stories offer a broader lesson about resilience, adaptability, and the courage it takes to keep going when things get hard.
At its heart, this book isn’t just about the ER—it’s about life. It’s about embracing the uncertainty, finding meaning in the small victories, and knowing that, even when the outcome isn’t what you hoped for, your efforts mattered.
Reading this book all those years ago was a pivotal moment for me. It reminded me that medicine is about more than science; it’s about connection, courage, and the willingness to step into the unknown.
And even now, years into my career, the lessons I took from Grim’s words still guide me. Because at the end of the day, whether in the ER or in life, sometimes all we can do is try our best to save a few lives—figuratively or literally—and know that trying is what makes the difference.
Favorite Quote, Insight, & Principle
Quote: There’s a fine line between exhaustion and purpose, and in the ER, that line blurs every single day.
Quote: You never forget the ones you lose, but you also never forget the ones you save. Both teach you something about being human.
Quote: In the ER, you’re not just saving lives—you’re bearing witness to them, in their rawest and most vulnerable moments.
Insight: The ER teaches you that people are infinitely fragile and yet astonishingly resilient.
Principle: Medicine isn’t just science; it’s storytelling. Every patient brings a narrative, and every doctor becomes part of it.
Author: Pamela Grim
Themes: Patient care, Medical school, Residency, Medicine
3. Personal development
Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less
Summary
Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown is a book that feels less like advice and more like a wake-up call. It asks one simple but profound question: Are you focusing on what truly matters, or are you letting the noise of life drown out your highest priorities? At its core, this book is about getting clarity, cutting out distractions, and reclaiming control over how you spend your most precious resource—time.
McKeown introduces us to the philosophy of Essentialism: the disciplined art of focusing only on the things that are truly essential while eliminating the rest. It’s not about doing more; it’s about doing less, better. For those of us constantly pulled in a thousand directions—balancing demanding careers, family, and personal growth—this book hits like a truth bomb. It exposes the hidden cost of saying “yes” too often and challenges us to confront the uncomfortable truth that being busy does not mean being productive.
What struck me most about this book is its radical simplicity. McKeown offers actionable insights that are both timeless and deeply relevant. He teaches us to ask better questions—“Is this the most important thing I can do right now?”—and to be unapologetic about saying “no” to what doesn’t align with our highest priorities. It’s about making space for the vital few by eliminating the trivial many. And let’s face it, we all know how easy it is to fill our days with trivialities disguised as urgency.
One of the most liberating ideas in the book is the notion that we have the power to choose. We’re not victims of our calendars or obligations; we have agency over where we invest our time and energy. This shift in mindset—toward living by design, not default—is life-changing. It’s about stepping back, reassessing, and creating a life that aligns with your values and goals.
If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, overcommitted, or just plain stuck, this book will speak to you. It’s a reminder that we’re not here to do it all. We’re here to do what matters. And when we focus on the essential, we free ourselves to live and work with purpose, clarity, and joy.
Favorite Quotes, Insights, & Principles
Quote: You cannot overestimate the unimportance of practically everything. -John Maxwel
Insight: When we forfeit our right to choose, someone else will choose for us.
Principle: Instead of asking, “What do I have to give up?” Essentialists ask, “What do I want to go big on?”
Author: Greg McKeown
Themes: Personal development, Living a full life, Productivity, Running a business
Trust is the quiet force behind every meaningful connection, every act of courage, and every step toward growth. It’s fragile yet transformative—both a risk and a reward. My handshake deal that unraveled taught me the pain of betrayal, while my Mazal u’Bracha experience in Israel reminded me of the beauty and power of trust when it’s honored. Together, these experiences reflect a fundamental truth: trust is the foundation of progress, whether in relationships, business, or self-growth.
The lessons from this week’s books—about resilience, focus, and the pursuit of what truly matters—echo this idea. Oliver Sacks reminds us to nurture curiosity and wonder; Pamela Grim shows us that presence and effort hold value, even in failure; and Greg McKeown teaches us to focus only on what’s essential. At the heart of these lessons lies trust: trusting the process, trusting the people who share your journey, and trusting yourself to pursue what truly matters.
In life, broken trust can make us want to close off, to guard ourselves against future pain. But the books we read, the lives we lead, and the connections we build all ask something different: to trust again. To open ourselves to growth. To focus on what matters most and honor it with our full selves. Trust doesn’t eliminate risk—it transforms it into an opportunity for something extraordinary.
So here’s the takeaway: Trust the essential. Trust what sparks curiosity, what deepens connection, and what aligns with your values. And most importantly, trust yourself to discern the difference between what drains you and what fills you with purpose. Because when trust meets intention, it doesn’t just change the outcome—it changes you.
Best regards ❤️ 🤝
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